I don't know about this whole pregnancy thing. About having a baby. About being responsible for another life. Even now, before it is even born, my choices affect it. What I eat, what I do, what I don't do. I want my baby to be healthy and happy. So I try to make choices that will give it the best chance for that wish to come true. But if I do something, like a lift a 30 lb box or accidently eat feta cheese (I didn't know the salad came with it. I tried to pick off most of it), how will these small insignificant things affect my baby.
Do we have enough money to afford this baby? Daycare, diapers, formula (oh please, oh please let me breastfeed), and a countless other expenses that I'm not thinking of.
I'm a worrier. I worry about everything, but especially money and my family. This drives Richard nuts.
I can usually get myself out of a situation if I don't feel comfortable or I get scared. But I'm stuck. I'm pregnant. And there is only one way out. This baby is coming whether we are ready or not. Some days I'm ready, but most days I'm scared as all hell.
Not including how much we can fuck up this child with our parenting skills, but what genetic mishaps did we pass along to it. Will have the worst of us or the best? I guess we can only hope for the best part.
I thought getting married, bonding yourself to another person for the rest of your life, was scary.
This is much, much more frightening.
Christian + Photography
7 years ago